I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
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