perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
