It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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