Dual....:-)
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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