As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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