when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize
