Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
