he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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