This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize