I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Randomize
