It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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