but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
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