fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
