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My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
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Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
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We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
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Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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