i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
