Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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