what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
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