I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
