i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
you never un-have a 4some
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
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