I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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