It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
