Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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