Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
