I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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