But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
should my penis look like a turkey
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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