they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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