David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
