I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
