It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
you win again, gameday.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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