3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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