Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
