is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Randomize
