Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
