I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
