There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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