Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
