that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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