can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize