Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
