just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
