He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
