Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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