I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
