I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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