Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I understand Curling. That high.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
