thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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