help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize