Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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