What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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