I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
