he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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